Depression is a very tricky beast. I can literally smile and have moments that I know are beautiful but it’s like they’re drenched in some sort of developing fluid. The photo metaphor doesn’t end there. 

I feel like days are grey, like a black and white photo blurred with fog. I feel like I’m not in them I’m seeing them through sad sad eyes. 

That’s the hardest part. Like Lisa Mitchell sings in ‘Dog’ (will post);

“And the worst part is knowing my part in it all/ Yeah the worst part is knowing it’s nothing at all”

Doubting. Wondering. Am I making it all up? Does everyone have days like this?

No. Not to this dark, dark extent.